Overcoming Fear, Self Doubt & Small-mindedness

What Winners Know But Rarely Say III

MISCELLANEOUS WRITINGS | 2015 EDITION | VOLUME 38

I regularly address fear, self doubt, vulnerability, shame, failure/rejection/mockery and relevant issues. If new to my Blog, I suggest beginning with the Fear Makes People Paralyzed, Stupid & Indecisive series. Wherever you turn though, as you seek to realize your goals against seemingly insurmountable odds, the advice — regardless of the diction — of celebrated winners (such as Oprah Winfrey) who beat the odds often is unanimous:

I had a lot going against me

There were absolutely no guarantees. Yes, I had my doubts. I even sucked

But I was determined to push through discomfort, authentically making it right as I learned from my failures. And why? Because...Being up to date with current affairs is not as sexy as getting news from TMZ, forums, The Daily Show or faux news these days. Confusing commentary and entertainment with real news, is. And winners are mindful of that. That's why they bring a strategic purpose beyond selfies, funny cats and other shareable silliness. I say that because these are times when uninformed small-minded people hanging out without any focus, priorities or direction in chatrooms and discussion forums keeping score, believe THEY are the experts. Happy to dish out vitriolic critique with caustic wit.

The real reason for all that sarcasm? Insecurity. A growing number, mentally ill, using Social Media to mask those selfsame insecurities.

Small-minded people see big thinkers and dreamers as a threat. And quickly recognizing them as the pint-sized people they truly are, despite any veil they wear, will save you time and energy, —if you heed Steve Harvey and Oprah Winfrey advice above.

Small-minded people don't communicate with you. Even though nothing — except malicious motives, including that chip on their shoulder — is stopping them. Even when in the same line of business or community, as you.

They avoid you. Communicate around you. Or behind your back.

No matter how many times you reach out to them in a spirit of friendship, they'd much rather communicate with others who similarly feel threatened by your goals, work ethic, integrity or imminent success. So, why should you share your dreams and pearls with them? Their predispositions, according to the Bible, makes them swine that isn't worth your time.

Small-minded people don't ask questions. They'd much rather assume, avoid you, or make up their own news and facts. Their threshold for tolerating inconvenient realities and (geopolitical) facts is so low that they discredit well-reputed and well-researched journalism, news organizations (think the Associated Press, the BBC, Reuters, New York Times, NPR, CNN, CBS, ABC, NBC) and news items. Hence the humorous Twitter #FoxNewsFacts and faux news. They create and shamelessly live in a silo aimed at attracting and catering to groupthink, conspiracy theory and gushing speculation. And when they site facts, its always from obscure, and often very extreme sources. Small-minded people don't like to be challenged by the truth either.

Driven by emotion and an alterverse of their own making rather than logic, small-minded folks ignore the genius of a supremely gifted boxer online (47-0) for any curious mind to study, and then call the results following a clash with the 48th victim, boring. Because having immersed themselves with faux news for years, their idol (God-loving and never disingenuous Manny Pacquiao) was either going to win, or else: “Boxing is dead.” And it made no difference how many experts told them that even on a good day, their idol was unlikely to beat Floyd Mayweather Jnr. the sinner who despite being God-loving, few know; plagued with injuries in the past, rotator cuffs or not, is mocked for his brittle hands”. Yet, always shows up ready to out-smart every opponent, and wins.

Small-minded people (today in particular), go straight for the comment button/section, check who is liking or favoriting what; whether it's a buddy of theirs, rather than bother to read a feature article and synthesize it themselves. They don't appreciate quality content either. And so, happily celebrate meaningless content.

Following such a crowd won't enlighten you. That's why Benjamin Franklin aptly nailed their pettiness: “The learned fool writes his nonsense in better language, but 'tis still nonsense.”

They are ostensibly motivated by the disingenuous: quantity and gimmicky content, without real substance and value. Because as we saw in Social Media Façade, it's all about some wall. It doesn't matter whether it's Fakebook. A board, a popularity list. Even if it's one that changes daily, and/or is manipulated. Here's one such example by one site's useful idiot right below sent to me by a member who was repeatedly disgusted by similar antics and quit the site.

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Never expect anything less from a small-minded person. Lacking any core, this is intellectually and morally as big as they get.

In fact, I once created, finished and shipped 5 content marketing pieces while they were busy badmouthing and whining about what a blog is or isn't (with a discussion topic that had my name in the title). All of which gives fresh impetus to Henry Ford's words: It has been my observation that most people get ahead during the time that others waste time.” Because riding that mojo, I grew, and went on to achieve even more that day and week.

Winners aren't concerned with homepages. Whatever that is, to a small-minded person keeping score. Or metrics and manipulated pages. Winners are passionately obsessed with delivering value. They aren't concerned or obsessed with what others are wearing and other outward appearances. Gossiping, trashtalk or crass behavior doesn't excite them. Nor do they concern themselves with the musings of other small-minded people and their daily trivia, via any media.

The mindset of a purpose-driven, self-assured winner who isn't small-minded is akin to Erica Cook's: “I'm not interested in competing with anyone. I hope we ALL make it.”

Yet it is only two-dimensional thinkers, the cousins of small-minded people, who feel threatened by your success, drive and passion. Full of excuses even when not negative, they'll convert you to permanent mediocracy.

You don't need the (negative) energy of small-minded folks who'd rather kill other's dreams — because having given up on theirs, they're on Social Media masking their bitterness, self-doubt and fears — incapable of motivating you through synergy, like three-dimensional thinkers do.

Whatever you do, be wary of small-minded people for they are divisionaries. Not visionaries. And overtime, their insecurities morphs into from bitterness to bitter twisted lies that distract.

Go mingle, and create lasting bonds with inspiring visionaries instead, because

○ ○ ○(Follow the Dove)

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